Why a Woman's Weave is None of Your Business

I wear a weave and I'm proud of it, dammit.

Well, actually I wear braids -- a style called tree braids that looks kinda like a weave because the braids are hidden.

No matter, posts like this one from a blog I read regularly annoy me. So does anyone who looks down on women who wear weaves.

Why? Because an outsider has absolutely no idea why a woman might choose to wear a weave. It's not always just a fashion thing, trust me.

I have various minor health problems. And somewhere along the line, my hair--already soft and fine--seemed to start growing more slowly in certain places. I don't know if it was the medications, relaxers, or what, that caused this problem. I just know that my hair is always longer on top and in the back than on the sides, and even though it's long enough to pull back in a ponytail, it's hard to find a style I can wear sans weave that doesn't look foolish.

So I embraced weaves. And braids. In short, I embraced what I feel looks good on me. I don't really care if certain people have an issue with it. It's not about them.

I know that my natural hair--now relaxer free and protected from daily styling because it's hidden and cornrowed--has its best shot at growing out in a healthy way as it's currently styled.

My advice for anyone--male or female--who feels you have a right to judge someone who wears a weave is to please consider this: You can never know another person's motivation. From cancer to arthritis treatments to a bad perm or coloring to simply being cursed with hair that just won't grow, there are plenty of reasons why a woman might choose to wear full or partial weaves or braids. You have a right to your personal preferences, yes, but broad generalizations about women who wear weaves are silly and usually false.

If you've been blessed with a head of healthy hair and you're happy with it and weave free, good for you. We're happy for you and trust me, we wish we could say the same.

Oh, but please don't consider this post a defense of bad weaves. It's not. I don't condone that at all. So, my fellow weave wearers, I just ask one thing: Keep it looking good ... because over-the-top, extreme, down-to-your-butt weaves are not cute, and overgrown braids or bad or poorly maintained weaves are NOT cool, so please do it right or not at all. :-)